Good God! Only in NOLA?

New Orleans' Joker

Loved her!

RIP Estelle Getty

Sent from my iPhone

In my dreams...

I am at this wedding and the woman in the red dress hits on me...

The most awesome kid ever!

For a friend...

Hit List

***Random obsessions and other things consuming my time lately


1. Pandora Radio-
I have been spending most of my waking time perfecting my stations playlist! You can find the results of my efforts by searching for "Angel With a Crooked Halo" at pandora.com. By far my favorite moment? When "If A Girl Answers (Don't Hang Up)" by Vanity 6 randomly came on!!


2. Motion Comics "Watchmen"-
This morning I downloaded the premiere episode of "Watchmen" in it's latest incarnation- a motion comic. Drawing upon their vast library of graphic novels, DC has recently begun releasing them in a new digital format. These motion comics aim "to bring a visually engaging experience to life through the use of subtle movements, voice-overs, sweeping music scores and stunning comic book artwork". I was totally sucked into it. Sure it's a fantastic story- but even beyond that- this is such a cool way to enjoy it. The voice over work is very good and they have animated most of the tale. Between this and the kick ass trailer for the movie- I am on hardcore
Watchmen overload!


3. The new Iphone-
I am sure that most of my obsessing is due to the fact that I haven't received mine yet- but man am I so over stoked for this. Basically, I am going to continue to pretend that this is the tool that will finally help me get my shit together. I have Mobileme! on the way, and scores of new applications downloaded to Itunes. Now all I need is the damn phone and I am ready to rule the world. Once I start using everything, I will share some reviews!!

No longer down with OPP!

Please indulge a little set up for my story:


My first job in New Orleans six years ago was as a bartender at Good Friends. I figured that jumping feet first into the Quarter would be a great way to initiate a Yankee in the ways of The Big Easy. Being the new guy, I was given the shit shift- 5 am to 1 pm. Since all bars in Maine closed at 2 am, I was curious as to what kind of people would be out and hitting the clubs at such an early hour. I soon found out that my clientele was a broad spectrum of hookers, crackheads, homeless people, career drinkers, and the occasional party animal not ready to end the night. Two favorites still stand out six years later.

One morning, a little after my shift began, 2 large, black trannies entered the otherwise empty bar. While one went to the "ladies room", the other came up to chat (and to my naiive mind, keep me busy while her gal pal cased the joint.

"Excuuuuuse me SIR, but do y'all have any Grey Goose up in here?" She asked while scanning the bar.

"Well of course we do honey- it is a bar after all."

"Mmmhmmm- well you know, I ain't never tried any of that. Do you suppose I could get a little sample?"

"A sample?! Does this look like Baskin & Robbins to you? What would you say if I told you that I had never had a blowjob from a tranny? Would you let me have a "sample?"

"Um, no baby- you'd have to pay."

"Bad for business, right? So- would you like to BUY a Grey Goose?"

"No baby, I'm cool. Would you like to buy a blowjob?"

"No baby, I'm cool too, but thanks and have a fun day at work!"

My next favorite leads into the reason for this post. Another very early morning, this time- a few more stragglers at various stages of incoherence. One young guy shuffled into the bar, pulled up a seat away from the others- and promptly laid his head upon rested arms across the bartop. Thinking I was going to have to boost him to the nearest hotel, shelter, or a more appropriate spot to nap. As I walked up to him, he lifted his head so that I could get a better look at him. While not totally unattractive, the boy was still looking a bit rough. His eyes were bloodshot, hair mussed up, three days since a decent shave, and cloths that really needed to meet the Maytag Man. At this point I was trying to remember if I had brewed enough coffee.

"Rough night my friend? Need some coffee?"

"Yes to the rough night, but definitely no to the coffee. You got anything stronger for under three dollars?"

"Three dollars will get you a draft beer- that's as strong as I can do for that- can you handle it?"

"I guess it will- but can I ask you a question first?"

Having been on this morning shift for about a month at this point- I had heard my far share of crazy ass questions, so I was ready for a doozy from this dude.

"How do I look?"

Mind you- when I first envisioned working in a gay bar- I did indulge in a few fantasies about cute guys hitting on me. And although I did get a lot of slurred offers for sex, I really hadn't been approached by anyone my folks would really approve of yet! So I was ready for a firm "not a chance dude" wrapped in a bit of a lie about a boyfriend or something. After all, I didn't want to hurt his feelings or my tip hehe!

"Well, to be honest, I can't really tell- I would suggest you calling it a night though. Maybe getting on home, showering, shaving, and sleeping for a bit. Do that, and then come ask me that same question and you'll probably get a better answer!"

"Well, I guess that answers my next question. Does it look like I just got out of OPP?"

I scratched my head a this point. Why the hell is this drunk kid asking me about hip hop? Does he think that I would be impressed with his early 90's rap reference that I would see beyond his appearance and give him a go?

"OPP? Like 'You down with OPP? Yeah you know me?"

"Huh? You been down with OPP too?!"

Ok- now I am confused, and bored with the conversation.

"Alright- what the hell are you talking about dude? Naughty By Nature- "OPP"? You asking if I know that song or something?"

"Song? What are you talking about? I asked about OPP- Orleans Parish Prison."

Mind you- that although I had lived in New Orleans a month, and thought I was getting the lingo down- there was still a ton I didn't know. Hell- it was only the week before that I figured out about the Westbank. For the first three weeks I lived in New Orleans, I heard the Westbank mentioned constantly. By customers, the news- you name it. For the life of me I couldn't figure out why any drunks in New Orleans would give a shit what was happening on the Gaza strip. But I digress hehe...

"Oh shit- OPP is the prison?"

"Yeah- that's what I was asking- I was stuck in there for three days."

"Ahhhhh- now I get it! I'm sorry dude- still kinda new here! But, yeah - you do."

Ok- back to the present. The real reason for my post.

This past Thursday night, I got out of work at the restaurant fairly early- well, early for the night shift- at 10:30. Knowing I had a full weekend, I decided to go out while I could and visit my friend during one of his first shifts at Laffites. I knew that my Friday morning at work was going to be an easy one, so I could handle a bit of a late night.

I got to his bar around midnight and had a few drinks while catching up with him. They didn't have much of a crowd at that point, so we were able to hang for about an hour. He started to get a little busy, so I told him that I was going to wander to the Pub and grab a drink or two there before returning back to him. Two Pub strength drinks later, I was starting to feel more than a bit buzzed, so I decided to load up on food and had a big breakfast at Clover Grill. When I left there, I crossed the street to Lafittes to tell Elijah that I was going to stop in a Good Friends before returning to him.

As I was walking down Dauphine, in the block before Good Friends, a police car stopped next to me. The office put on the lights, and told me to come over to them. Thinking they might be asking me if I had seen someone they were looking for or something like that- I went over. Then started the 5th degree- who are you? what are you doing? do you have any drugs? have you been drinking? etc.

"My name is Andrew, I had a few drinks down the street. I am walking to another bar right now. No, I don't have any drugs. What's the problem?"

"I am asking the question boy, not you. Give me your ID."

Rolling my eyes (which I guess they don't like), I handed it to him while I struggled to keep my smart ass mouth shut.

After running my name through their supercomputer, they came across an open warrant for a traffic citation in Jefferson Parish. Turns out that when I paid my fine and court cost to JP last year, they never bothered to register my payment. Therefore it was still open, and the NOPD officers couldn't be happier. Now they had a reason to cuff me for a ride.

I get to the lovely Orleans Parish central lock up and then the fun really began. For those of you not fortunate enough to spend any time there- please let me describe it for you:

A large warehouse of a building- easily the size of a football field. Grey cement floor, white cinderblock walls, and green cages all over the place. Along the front, a line of counters labeled "Fast Track", "Booking", "Property", "B of I" (not sure what the hell that was), and "Medical". In front of the counters, in two sections, are 5 rows of 10 chairs. Behind these is the Watch Commander's area- a few computers and desk chairs. To the right of the Commander's area- there is a large room with a green gate and door. This is the Men's Holding Tank. There is a similar one to the left of his area for women. There is one long wooden bench around two sides of the tank. The left wall has four toilets- all in plain view of the room. When I was put in, there were at least 60 men already camping out. Since there is not enough room for so many to sit on a bench, there were people sprawled all over the floor as well.

Now that I have set the scene- let me add some time reference. It was about 2:30 am when the cops put me in the cruiser. So I figure I got to Central In-take around 3:00 am. I sat in a chair by the door for a while- during this time they took all of my stuff and put it in an envelope. After about 45 minutes, they brought me over to the tank. Maybe it was the booze, but up until this point- I was doing alright. Not too stoked about my situation, but more of a shrug my shoulders "what can ya do" type feeling. Having to enter the lock tank, with the 75 other dudes- that made me a bit nervous. HEHEHE. Like how I put that? "A bit nervous"? I pretty much scanned the room as quickly as possible, found a spot that was mostly empty and plopped down on my ass with my head tucked to my lap.

That was my pose for the next 4 hours. At one point I might have fallen asleep for a bit- but in no way was it restful. Aside from keeping my eye on everyone else there, the floor was extremely hard, and the a/c was cranked so high that it was 50 degrees at the most. I guess they keep it like that to deal with the smell- but let me tell you- I would have preferred a bit of stench over shivering my face off.

Not sure how long I had been in there before I was called out as a fag. I do know that I was completely sober at the time. Which in hindsight is probably for the best. Had I been drunk, I wouldn't have been able to resist the urge to mouth off. I just did my best to nod off and hope that they'd get bored. Which they did- until the same dude saw someone else he thought was gay and started in on him. Maybe this dude was trying to work up a more "Oz" like atmosphere- get the gay sex started. I don't know- but he eventually shut up.

At 7am the new shift came on. I only noticed a change because everyone in the tank started griping about it. Apparently- to those in the know- nothing gets done for at least 2 hours around shift change. Not that you would really notice the difference. From what I had seen, not a damn thing ever gets done at all. Not that it is knowledge I am proud of having- but I do understand the whole booking process. They take your picture, your prints, give you your rights, and have you verify everything on your ID. Even with the most antiquated system and crankiest perp (like how I use the lingo?!) it should take no longer than 15 minutes to do everything. In Orleans, they have it even sweeter- there are different people to each part of the booking. You meet first with a nurse to go over any wounds, meds you might be on, etc. While you are doing that- someone is running your social through the national database to see how bad you have been in your life. Then you should proceed to the person taking your picture and information and end with your picture.

When they finally got around to doing any bookings at 8:30, I noticed two phones in the tank. Turns out you can use them at any time- but here's the catch: they only allow collect calls, and you have to call a land line. All calls to cell phones are blocked. Now, I don't know about you- but ever since I switched to a cell phone, I have no idea what anyone's phone number is at all. To make it worse- it's safe to say that 95% of the people that I know only use cell phones as well. The only person with a land line number that I remembered was my boss. Thankfully, he's gotten into enough trouble since I have known him that this was just a bump in the road hehe. Luckily I got him on the phone and after we both laughed a bit, he said he was going to call his lawyer friend to get me out. He was also going to call the friend of mine who helped with the JP ticket. So after hearing all of this, I felt a bit better. I just assumed it would be a matter of time before my release came through and I could get the fuck out of there.

Well, by the time it was noon, I was still waiting for something to happen. I had not been booked, and no official had said a word to me. I called my boss again and he said that the lawyer had gotten the judge to okay my release at 9:30, but until I was processed, there wasn't much else they could do. So back to pretending I am patient. Pretty much the same story for everyone else in there. From what I could tell by the bands on their hands- there were at least 50 other guys in the tank who were waiting to be booked as well.

I made my way to the front of the gate so that I could see what was going on in the booking area. From what I could tell (and I have done enough installs to know the signs) Orleans Parish was implementing an entirely new booking system. Digital cameras mounted in rows next to computers. A thumbprint scanner to verify prints, etc. The way it was set up- there were four booking stations, so they should have been able to crank through all of the inmates. However, that was soooooo not the case. Their was one woman sitting at her computer, talking with another woman sitting next to her. Not once in the 30 minutes I watched them did either look at their screens. Hovering above them were two people that I assume worked for the computer company. They were scurrying around checking and rechecking cameras and computers.

The bookings slowly started around 12:30, and they would bring dudes out a dozen at a time. Apparently you are numbered when you are brought in, and they "go in order" of your arrival. That was a load of shit, as I watched guys who came in after me get booked. So I wasn't really trusting any of the "way things are done" with the deputies. Finally, at around 2:30, one of the deputies asked all of the men with grey armbands to get in line. Still having your grey armband meant that you had not started the booking process and needed to see the nurse.

When it was my turn to get started, the nurse asked me if I had any wounds, whether I was on any medications, had I been drinking at all in the past 48 hours (um, that's why I am here I think was my response hehe), and then asked if I had done any drugs. She clipped off my grey band, had me sign the health form, and asked me to head to the seating area and wait for them to call my name.

While I was waiting, a couple of ornery ladies were brought to processing. Two of them started a huge fist fight and one was dragged to isolation. When this happened, everyone else in the place bust out laughing. Had I not been there for the reason I was- I would have not been able to stop laughing and probably would have egged them on more! After they hauled her off, the Watch Commander (who I had already pegged as the leading hard ass of the shift), made everyone in the seating area go back to the tank. Telling him that I was told to sit there was met with a "GET THE FUCK IN THE TANK". The fact that I was stopped in the middle of booking will come into play later...

After things had calmed down, they resumed booking by calling some of the people who were waiting up front with me. My name however, was not on that list. After two more rounds of groups getting booked and me still on my ass- I started to get worried. I had heard horror stories of people getting lost in the OPP system- sometimes accidentally, and other times on purpose. I was beginning to wonder who I had pissed off. I was purposely polite, subservient, obedient, you name it- anything that I normally am not! It's very hard to get any questions answered by anyone working for the Sheriff's Dept. Not only do most of them not give a shit, but when you do find one who will listen- there are 50 other dudes trying to get their attention as well. So the only one's to ask about what was happening were my tank mates. They all told me the same thing- get used to where you are dude, cause you ain't leaving for a while.

A little after 3:00 pm, a woman came up with a file and asked for me to come out. She brought me up to the front and had me sit in front of a camera at the booking section. I could see the cover of my folder and in huge, black marker- RELEASE was written down the side. I was beginning to think I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. I was pretty ticked that I was made to sit there for 12 hours, but the prospect of freedom overrode that. A deputy came up and took my picture. Then he had me stand at his computer and began to scan my prints for the database. Unlike most of his co-workers, he was pretty nice and we joked around a bit. He told me that my release was all set, and once I was finished getting printed, I was "free to go". I was so happy to hear that. He gave me a little grief for not paying my ticket, and was sympathetic when I told him that I had paid it but it wasn't logged. He said that he could tell I didn't belong there, because most of the people in here have major problems. He sent me back to the seating area and told me to wait for them to bring me to the releasing area.8

As I am sitting up front, another newbie is making a stink by the door. Literally. He was obviously drunk as a skunk and needed to take a leak- so he whipped out his dick and started pissing on the wall. As expected, the humorless Watch Commander didn't share in the laughter and sent everyone back to the tank again. By my estimation, it was about 4:30 pm at this point. I told some of the dudes around me that I had my release, so they assured me that once they started rollouts again, I would be sprung. My name wasn't included in the next two groups to be released. So I started to wonder whether there had been a mistake, and that I wasn't really released. I tried asking any deputy that came to the gate, but not one of them responded.

Once it turned 6:00, I knew that I was screwed. I'd been around for the first shift change, so I knew that all work was on hold for the next two hours. Watching the night crew shuffle in- I got worried. I guess I didn't notice when I was brought in- but the sheer tonnage of the night crew is massive. I could tell that these were the real loafers of the department. That light at the end of the tunnel was gone. I was beginning to wonder if I was ever going to be outside again. To my surprise, the deputies on the night shift- although all bitter as hell- actually worked at a pretty good clip. Once they started taking people to booking around 8:00- they did their best to do several at a time.

Many groups of releases and bookings, but still no news for me. I was going stir crazy at this point. My ass was killing me from the hard floor. I was totally freezing my ass of- having been picked up in a short sleeved shirt, jeans, and sandals. Other than the bit of nodding off I had done around 5 am- I had not been to sleep since Wednesday night. I was able to joke a bit with the less scary of my tankmates, but I was getting very demoralized and doubted I'd ever leave. So at around 11:00, I called my boss again to let him know I was still locked up. He was floored- the last he'd heard was that I had been released hours ago- my lawyer was told the same thing. They all just assumed that I was so bushed, I went home to sleep and would call them in the morning. He immediately called a cop that we both know and told him what was going on with me. Earlier the cop had said that he couldn't do anything until they processed me, but this was ridiculous.

About a half an hour later, he walked into lock up. He knew most of the people working- and though he didn't think too highly of them- buddied up and chatted for a bit. Then he started asking what was going on with me. Why was I still in there? Was there anything he could do to speed things up? Thank god for his presence- because that is when they finally noticed the mistake that had been made. By processing my release before booking me, I was left in limbo in the system. He got them to agree to step it up, and before leaving, shouted that it wouldn't be long now.

But- knowing they had made an error did very little to add any urgency to their job. It took another hour and a half to get booked, and then another 45 minutes to get to the release area. Meaning that by the time I was given my things back- it was a full 24 hours since my arrival. To make things even worse- they make you sign for your property before they give it to you. And as I was walking out, I noticed that both bracelets I had been wearing were gone. So was my pack of smokes! I was ticked about the bracelets- but whatever- I know they are gone forever. Along with the 24 hours of my life.

So thats the tale- sorry it's so long, but it felt even longer! I wish it was all over too- but I get to go to court for the whole thing in the morning! I am going with my big grin, my arrest papers, and my copy of the cancelled check from JP. Wish me luck that this has a happy ending?!!!

Brad Pitt, Cate Blanchett, Tilda Swinton, Julia Ormond, and the Garden District?!

I almost got into a car accident on my drive to work one morning as they were filming on Napoleon. I saw Brad from across the street and ran up on the curb to avoid a car in front of me!! Looks kinda fun, even if just for recognizing houses!

How can I compete?

She will always be in Brigadoon...

I have just read that Cyd Charisse has passed away. I am so very saddened by this- almost as much as when Gene Kelly died. Brigadoon has been on my favorite movie list since I was a child. I can't imagine how many times I have seen the film- and each time as enchanted as the first. I can't even begin to put into words how that movie and others like it have shaped my life. Hell- it's probably one of the reasons I am still single. The chemistry with those two- the way they danced, the way they sang, the way they looked at each other. I have always been searching for that overpowering love. I have tears in my eyes know thinking of the final scene when he came back to find her waiting for him in the mystic fog. I am about to put the dvd in and cry myself to sleep- but with a smile on my face as I thank her for delightfully blighting my youth! She was so wonderful in so many pictures- "Silk Stockings", "Singing in the Rain", "The Harvey Girls" (which I saw again on TCM the other day!!!) and so many more. Enjoy the wonderful clip "Heather in the Hills" and how lovely she looked in Janet's "Alright":

Master of the Internet

I wanna go to the Internet Heaven too! Dont leave me behind!

... I like the part where they say more than 10,000 people are using the internet...

Again- much thanks to Rene

If you don't check Retrowonderland often- you totally need to start! Rene has some great posts lately, I have been downloading all afternoon! Remember this one?!



The video is completely ridiculous- but I loved this song!!

Sex And The City- The Game

Damn- it has been ages since I had time to post anything here! Running around like a chicken with my head cut off between two jobs rots! Thankfully I will be able to slow down long enough to catch up with the girls this weekend. Even if it is horrible- I am still so excited to see the Sex and the City movie! I ran across this fun drinking game via Queerty- so I thought I would share. I was already planning on smuggling in cocktails- so adding a sporting angle would really be sweet!!

One Drink

• The word “fabulous” is used.

• Samantha talks about how she used to sleep around.

• Miranda says “Brady.”

• Carrie smokes.

• Dramatic sigh.

• Any talk of private kindergarten.

Two Drinks

• Charlotte starts getting real overbearing about the wedding plans.

• Carrie remarks, “I love it!”

• Steve’s all dopey.

• Anyone makes a deal about Miranda living in Brooklyn.

• Tears of joy.

• Big calls Carrie “kiddo.”

Three Drinks

• Tears of sadness.

• Anyone refers to a gay man with a feminine term (girl, princess, etc)

• Every time a Latino person speaks without an accent.

• Celeb cameo! (Four if it’s Bloomberg.)

• Any mention of Aidan.

• One of “the ladies” says to Big, “You better not hurt my girl again.”

• Jennifer Hudson says something like, “The difference between white women and black women is …”

Four Drinks

• Big gets cold feet.

• There’s a black person speaking who is not Jennifer Hudson.

• Anyone besides Miranda actually goes into Brooklyn.

• Disparaging term for women is used.

• Buying things, sex, eating or drinking recommended as valid solutions to a real problem.

• Charlotte talks about how weird it is to be Jewish.

Finish Your Drink

• Muslim cameo!

• Anyone says, “Spending hundreds of dollars just to buy more shoes is fucking stupid,” or, “I don’t need that.”

• Big takes the subway.

• Carrie’s editor tells her, “Y’know, this is kind of silly; I’m going to need you to rework it.”

• Tears of regret over a life lived shopping and talking about shopping.

• Petrovsky stumbles into a room, drunk on absinthe, and shoots Big in the chest.

Get your Tom on!

Anyone else in a Tom Waits kind of mood?

And Fernwood Tonight?!

DOTTIE MEME

Following Jason's wonderful lead over at "night is half gone..." I now present my version. The rules are simple:

Musician Challenge: Pick an artist
Rules: using only SONG NAMES, cleverly answer these questions...
No repeating song names...

I chose the wonderful, underrated Dottie West

1.) Are you a male or female? – AIN’T NOTHIN LIKE A WOMAN
2.) Describe yourself? – ROCK AND ROLL DRUMMER IN A COUNTRY GIRLS BAND
3.) Describe your day? – MAMA YOU’D HAVE BEEN PROUD OF ME
4.) Describe where you currently live – PAPER MANSIONS
5.) If you could go anywhere, where would you go – MY MINDS GONE TO MEMPHIS
6.) Your best friend is – JOHNNIE WALKER, OLD GRANDDAD, JACK DANIELS, AND YOU
7.) Your favorite color is – BLUE FIDDLE WALTZ
8.) You know that – SHE CAN’T GET MY LOVE OFF THE BED
9.) What's the weather like? – COUNTRY SUNSHINE
10.) If your life was a television show, what would it be called? – LET ME OFF AT THE CORNER
11.) What is life to you? – MAKIN MEMORIES
12.) What is the best advice you have to give? – A LESSON IN LEAVING
13.) Describe your ex? – I DON’T WANT TO PLAY HOUSE
14.) Your current relationship status? – JUST CALL ME LONESOME
15.) What's your favorite hobby? – WALKING IN THE DARK
16.) When you think of your friends? – FUNNY, FAMILIAR, FORGOTTEN FEELINGS
17.) What do your friends think of you? – HIS EYE IS ON THE SPARROW
18.) What does your current love interest think of you? – NO ONE TO CRY TO
19.) You always travel with? – LONG BLACK LIMOUSINE
20.) The best way to end a long day? – ROCKY TOP
21.) Your occupation is? – HOUSE OF LOVE
22.) When you grow up, you want to? – LOVE AS LONG AS WE CAN
23.) What does your family think of you? – I WISH YOU WOULDN’T DO THAT
24.) Your favorite food is? – I MAKE A GREAT CUP OF COFFEE
25.) You want to be remembered as? – LIKE A FOOL

Dancing at work- De La Soul lovin-

***I know that I have been off the grid for wayyyyy too long. A second job is eating up my time- making that extra paper so that I can live large at Jazz Fest. I will do my best to actually post soon- but until then- dance with me? Expect some Jazz Fest related songs soon- and with me getting ready for Mary J. and Jay Z tomorrow night- you know I'm gonna represent!!!

I dare you not to dance to any of these songs. Period. Don't dance. It's not going to be easy though- De La Soul knows how to make you move.

Starting with the I-N-C-R-E-D-I-B-L-E "Me, Myself, and I"- whenever I hear that beginning- I don't think of P-Funk, or the De La Soul boys- I think CINDY!!! Remember Cindy Crawford's "House of Style" on MTV?



Now- how about the brilliant collab w/ Chaka? "All Good" is the SHITTTTTTTTT!



Finally- one of the top 5 weekend celebration tracks bruh- FOR REAL!!! "Roller Skating Jam" boyueeeee:

Four F@#$king Thousand?!

If 4,000 is the number they are telling us- then I really hate to think what the actual number is- or how many Iraqis have been killed. Watching "Bush's War" on PBS should be mandatory for all voters.

Thanks to Nico at Huffington Post for this:

Who's your ideal TV boyfriend?

Found this fun little quiz at Night Is Half Gone... (a terrific site you should check often!).  Turns out my ideal TV boyfriend is a hottie on a crappy show!!  Woohoo!!  Certainly explains my love life to a T!

Who is Your Ideal TV Boyfriend?

More on Gossip Girl. Created by BuddyTV

Supreme Beings of Pleasure

There was a time when I used to drop tons of money at the music store. I would normally be at Tower or Sam Goody's etc on Tuesdays when new music came out, and then again on the weekend to load up on songs I had thought of during the week. Then along came Napster- and I became the Quincy Jones of downloading. Screw paying ten bucks for a cd with ONE song that was half decent. I was stoked- I could pick and choose the songs and artists that would be on my discs. I still do this, but I often miss the ALBUM- the artists story told in sequence. I used to love it when I couldn't pick a favorite song- just let it play beginning to end and repeat. Albums like APPETITE FOR DESTRUCTION, PURPLE RAIN, THE CHRONIC, LIKE A PRAYER, BACK IN BLACK, etc. That being said- let me share my latest find.

I found this first video by Supreme Beings of Leisure on a friends blog and loved the song so much I bought (gasp) their new album that night. As described on the label's site:

"Supreme Beings of Leisure released their third album this week, the enchanting 11i. The album's 11 songs take you through a day in the life of the protagonist, from "The Light" to "Lay Me Down". Loungey, sexy, atmospheric... this is the album to take you away."

I couldn't agree more- I have been hypnotized by this album. And as my friend wrote on his blog- I definitely will be fucking to this cd!!

Unfortunately, there aren't any videos for the new album out yet- but you can check the band and tunes out at their

Myspace Page

. But for now- enjoy "Strangelove Addiction" and "Never The Same" from their 2000 debut- followed by the sampler for their latest! And as a bonus- their beautiful remix of The Bee Gees!!!!

Let me know what you think!!

Lovely

Now- to be perfectly up front with y'all- I am not, nor have I ever been a big NBA fan. Hell- other than watching the beautiful swimmers and others during the Olympics- I really don't watch any sports at all. Despite not following any of it, like most other pop culture whores- I know who most of the bigger names in sports are and have those that I enjoy outside the arena. One athlete that I have always been tickled by is Charles Barkley. I love anyone who says whatever is on their mind- even when I don't agree, I respect the fact that it's just one person's opinion. If they happen to be able to shoot off their opinion with a little wit- even better! For a while, it seemed like Charles was just saying shit to provoke people, no real reason to weigh in on things- just stirring it a bit. But hell- they kept putting a microphone in front of him so why not? Charles is in New Orleans right now, along with many of his NBA buddies for the All-Star Game and the weekend festivities. For some reason, Wolf Blitzer had him on "The Situation Room" and the Presidential race came up. Once again, Mr. Barkley did not disappoint, and shared his thoughts on the candidates, the current state of the major parties, the religious right, and more:



How fun!!! For kicks, I hunted down some of his more colorful quotes:

After initially making light of Magic Johnson's HIV status, Charles had this to say when asked if he was concerned while playing against Magic- "We're just playing basketball. It's not like we're going out to have unprotected sex with Magic."

"I had to explain to my daughter why that skank Monica Lewinski has an hour special on HBO this weekend." (No explanation necessary there hehe!)

On endorsements: These are my new shoes. They're good shoes. They won't make you rich like me, they won't make you rebound like me, they definitely won't make you handsome like me. They'll only make you have shoes like me. That's it.

It's that time of year again!!!

Check out this Webpage!

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That's right folks- it's that time of year again! Now before anyone cries foul because I have pretty much kept my head shaved since last year- come on now- were you really donating just because of my hairstyle (or lack of one hehehe)? But to keep in the spirit of things- I have not been shorn since Mardi Gras (it realllllllly helps get beads!) and will not so much as pluck a gray before the event! I will be posting pictures daily of the "growth" but in the meantime- DIG DEEP! I am low balling my goal, but hope to increase it as we close in on the big day!! Make me proud once again my friends!

Andrew

***Please pass this along - Hell, make it viral!! And just to sweeten the deal- anyone who donates AND comes to the shaving on 3/14/08- gets to drink with me and quite probably get a kiss or two!!!! How about that?! Hmmm- maybe I should contact the New Orleans Tourism Board...

Break out the Panty Shield!!!

I just read that they are going to be bringing the now canceled tv show "Noah's Arc" to the big screen!!! Personally, I thought the show was pretty shitty- but the EYE CANDY has me moist just remembering it! My plan is to bring my Ipod to the theater, put on the playlist I listen to when I watch "How Stella Got Her Groove Back", or "Meet Joe Black", or any Chris Evans film- and ennnnnjoyyy the ride hehehe! So screw a trailer- enjoy all of the yummy Darryl Stephens you can find!!

You know the drill...

Some of my favorite romantic tunes for your enjoyment- since I am sure that by this afternoon- I will have received enough "Happy V Day" text messages to make me hunt down "Love Stinks" hehe!

To start- one of my allllllllll time favorites!!


Followed closely by this song- the happiest love song that I know!!


And the incomparable Teddy P.!

Keepin It Real

I probably shouldn't be sharing my secrets- but if Martha Stewart and Oprah can show you how to live- why can't Andrew?! Just watch the progression of the first few photos- you see that pink boa in the first shot? This is like one of those Marlon Perkins Wild Kingdom specials- I saw that boa, and I knew it was going to be mine! I had Jenni save the moment in pictures- all for your enjoyment!! While you digest that- just think- this first set of pictures only represents about 30 minutes of Fat Tuesday- now you KNOW, this here Damn Yankee, has more to share!!!

GREAT song- TRAGIC video

"She's Gone" by Hall & Oates is one of my favorite pop/soul/rock/r&b songs of all time. The smooth harmonies they are famous for just lend to my ear in this one big time- one of the few of their songs that John Oates (the brunette) handles lead vocals on, and does it well. So why such a horrible video? I know it was early in the days of actually making videos, being released in 1973- but shit- Darryl Hall looks pre-op, and John Oates looks post-op- if the op in his case is a lobotomy. And what's with the clown dressed as the devil that walks by when they say "I'd pay the Devil to replace her..."?! It's like it was directed by a first grade class- who phoned it in!!! You be the judge- and then watch how it should be shown in the cover by Tavares!!

Dancing at work- New (at least to me) dance pop!!!

Let me know what you think!!

Ok- this first video- the debut single from the Dead Wasps totally kicks ass! Now tell me how crappy their publicist is- it was posted a little over a year ago- and the view count is under 600?! WTF? Am I missing something here? You decide:



I probably should be saving this next one for Valentines Day- it's by The Lovemakers- but I can't wait! I have been bugging the shite out of poor Amanda here at the office with this tune on repeat. I have always been a big fan of shaking that ass- so any song that urges it, and with a fun beat, is a winner in my book:



How much am I loving this next song by The Ting Tings?! A totally simple song- that has wormed its way into my crevices!!! Enjoy- in the same way that you may repeat- ella ella ellla a a a - you get the point!!

Since it is almost Valentines Day...

Despite the fact that I only had a boyfriend on Valentines Day once in my life (who totally dropped the ball romance wise), I have always loved February 14th. Not for the lovey dovey shite, but for the best present I ever received- my lovely niece Meghan was born on February 14, 1993! Which, for all of you mathematicians out there, means that my darling Meg is going to be 15 tomorrow! I can't even begin to tell you how freaked out I am that she is freaking 15!!! And my fragile state of mind and age complex is nothing compared to my sisters! Turns out that for Meg's B-day present- she is going to Driver's Ed!!!! In honor of my sister- or more like out of deference to her- I will not be dedicating any Sammy Hagar tunes, but rather my favorite song to mention driving. There are several note worthy versions of this song- but in my humble opinion- Cyndi own's it- sorry Roy and Celine- but you all have other landmarks!!

Getting ready for Idol

How about this hot boy from the Swedish Idol? I'm all about some Eddie Razaz now! Check out the hot pics too!!!

I'm pretty sure they don't understand the lyrics!

Gallow's humor

I should totally be on the road to my interview right now- but HAD to share this with y'all!

Mary Kate's Heath Ledger Thought Process- from the folks at jossip.com!

Jazzfest 2008 Lineup

Woohoo- Mardi Gras isn't even here yet and I am already planning the festivities for Jazzfest! The lineup this year looks fun as hell- I am definitely going to be needing the Brass Pass again! No way I want to miss a day!

Some of the headliners- The Neville Brothers, Stevie Wonder, Billy Joel, Jimmy Buffet, Tim McGraw, Santana, Maze Feat. Frankie Beverly, Sheryl Crow, Widespread Panic, Dr. John, Al Green, Diana Krall, Keyshia Cole, Robert Plant and Alison Krauss, The Roots, Steel Pulse, Elvis Costello and Allen Toussaint, Cassandra Wilson, Bettye LaVette, Michael Franti & Spearhead, Ingrid Lucia, Kenny Wayne Shepherd, and many more!

I am definitely going to need to pack an extra pair of underwear for Robert Plant- he may not have his looks anymore- but shit- when that dude screams, I get wet!

Not sure that there is a clear front runner for who I am most excited to see. STEVIE?! I have always wanted to see him! Same goes for AL GREEN! I have seen Billy Joel several times- as recently as this past spring here in NO- always a great show. I saw Santana back in the 80s so it will be awesome to catch them again. I've never been a big parrot head- but Buffet's shows bring insane crowds. Speaking of insane crowds- wait until all of those hippies swarm for Widespread. I am going to be walking around with deodorant that day for sure!

I am certain to gush more about this in the weeks to come- but for now- sit back and enjoy some of the songs I hope that we can hear live!!

Fingers Crossed Now

I am probably jinxing myself by even talking about this - but I was just contacted by Country Day for an interview! It's for a Pre-K teaching position! Ideally I would like to get back into a Kindergarten class, but this is totally a step towards that!! Woohoo!!!

Dancing at work- Young At Heart

How fricking cute!! And how many dirty diapees? I am really looking forward to this movie!!





And my FAVORITE!!!

Dancing at work- Blowing up Chromeo

First of all- much love and thanks to
DJ Beverly Skillz for her kick ass new mix- if you don't have it- get it!!
NOW ! I play it constantly and one of my favorite parts is this first song "Bonafied Lovin'" by Chromeo.



For your added pleasure- check out the videos for Tenderoni and Fancy Footwork!
Chromeo on Myspace

I'm just saying...

Do you suppose the real reason that Eddie and Tracey are divorcing sooooooooo soon after there marriage is (whispering) that they actually waited until the wedding night- and he found out that even though she looked rather trannish, she is in fact a real girl with real girl parts?



**BTW- Thank you Lucious!

Dancing at work- AH WOOOO HOOOO

The first time I remember hearing the Dazz Band was at the Bangor State Fair in 1983. I was 12 years old- and on my favorite ride "The Flying Bobs" (a.k.a. The Himalayan, Matterhorn- you get the picture!)- thankfully that day the Carny in charge was really f'd up and let us ride for what seemed like hours.
The only song he would play- "Let It Whip" and I was totally hooked. 25 years later it is still one of my absolute favorite songs. If you don't want to shake your ass to this song- I don't want to know you hehe!



While "Let It Whip" was their most popular single- other tunes in their library were just as impressive- enjoy "Joystick", "Swoop", and "Invitation to Love"- and for a little lagniappe- a jam with the architect of Funk- George Clinton!

Dancing at Work- missing the Tom Tom Club

For some reason I am really in the mood for bouncy music- who better to provide what I need than the Tom Tom Club?! God I love their music! "Genius of Love" has got to be one of my all time favorite songs- the lyrics, the beats, the wacky video!!

"I'm in heaven
With the maven of funk mutation
Clinton's musicians such as Bootsy Collins
Raise expectations to a new intention"



With such a kick ass song like that- it's easy to forget some of their other masterpieces- I am including "Wordy Rappinghood" and "The Man With the 4-Way Hips" to refresh your memory (or open your mind)!

Dancing at work- Monday Morning new tunes

I hate to be one of those "re-posters" who just lurks various blogs for content- but sometimes it can't be helped! I keep finding interesting new groups on Queerty.com so I want to share my taste expansion. Since I rarely hear anything new- in my car it's either my ipod, cd's i make, or the classic rock or r/b station- the internet or friends are the only ways I catch a new tune in my head!

Enjoy yourself with a peek at Elmore Judd- very funky, very sexy, very me right? hehe!

"You must think I am an alarmist" "Only because you sound like one"

That is a quote from one of my all time favorite films- "Victor/Victoria"- possibly one of the funniest movies ever produced. Unfortunately, the quote is used to highlight my reaction to Gov. elect Jindal's latest appointment

I know absolutely nothing about this Alan Levine dude, other than what I have read in a few articles online. I intend to do a bit more digging, and hopefully will find nothing too scary. It's just this- of allllllll the people on the planet- did he have to pick someone with such close ties to the fucking Bush family? Jesus- between this and the home schooled religious nut he's tapped to be his chief of staff, I am thinking my predictions about Jindal are still dead on- he's a tool of the dark side my friends! We are f'd!

Dancing at work- New music Friday w/ Friendly Fire

Came across this group via our friends over at queerty.com- if you don't check that site hourly- something is wrong with you hehe! They always have great tunes, videos, news reports- make it your homepage!

Dancing at work- Formal Fantasy

So I am donning tails for the first time this evening- attending the Osirus Ball in Mobile- this is going to be the fulfillment of a fantasy first hatched when I was 4 years old. One of my first favorite films was "Top Hat" with Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers. It is such fantasy to watch them dance. It has remained on my Top 10 Film list longer than any other movie. I could easily watch it every day for the rest of my life and still feel the same thrill throughout. I have warned my fellow ballers - so I might as well tell y'all- I am going to go buck fuckin wild if I do not get to hear at least one of the following songs tonight.

But first- the trailer:

Dancing at work: T'AINT no thing

I just love the word AIN"T - especially now that I am some southern motherfucker- I ain't lying bruh- I be loving me some shit (god I am such a fag- all I can think about is that episode of Sex in the City where Samantha was sleeping with that fine black man and every other word was WHACK- exceptin I ain't sleepin with no fine black man...currently) ***Oh and by the way- I am only a racist in that I love to racially profile- and I only like to racially profile when I am in the mood to date- eat it!!****









THE BEST****************


I keep you fresher than the next bitch----

A Look Back At 2007: The Year In Pictures

My lovely cousin Noreen's wedding to a great man name of Kevin. This is my mother and I entertaining the troops.

Same wedding, not long after this- my aunt (pictured with me) was asked where she found the "entertainer" to dance at the wedding...meaning her loose hipped nephew Andrew. I did my fair share of "get your bitch ass off that chair and boogie with me"